Monday, January 07, 2008

10 Dull Details about a Dreary Canuck

So my dear Doralong has decided I'm to be the next victim of this evil plot to destroy character and heap humiliation on honourable heads - hey I alliterated! I feel so inadequately Canadian when I see other friends response to these questions. Here goes.

1) Three Exes I would pretend not to know today:
I am one of those people who's always spoken with my Exes - so damned civilized us Canucks eh? - because there was a time when they meant something in my life. Though I would probably be cool with Corey - after all he had me totally convinced that I was an uneducated dolt because I didn't have a University degree and he was ashamed of our relationship because of it. Alan I would embrace warmly because the red colour his face would turn would compliment his black cassock and purple cincture. Sadly George and Lawrence were early victims of AIDS and I only wish I could see them again. Blake - well damn it he took the pictures at my wedding this past year. And Doug - he introduced me to Laurent so when I do see him I have to thank him for the past 29 years. Okay this is getting a bit too much. Next?

2) The most scandalous rumor to pass through my high school.
Which one? Which one? Bill Bennet doing it with Meredith Wright in her living room when her parents came home - nope that was Junior High. Ricky Braithwaite doing it with Rosalind Pritchard in a box car down by the railway tracks (hey I'm not making this up you know) - nope Junior High again. Me doing it with Bob Reynolds or Billy Gale or Harry Price in the school washroom - nope we kept that fairly hush hush. It would have to be Mr. Crozier feeling up Valerie Carter in the lab storage room and her reporting it to her parents. Mr. Crozier went on a realllly long sabatical after that.

3) The time I Knew Santa didn’t exist.
When I was home from school sick and I overheard my mother on the phone ordering my Walt Disney Theatre set from Eaton's. I would have been about 8 or 9 but I didn't break the news to my mother until I was 20.

4) The funniest thing I did in a house of worship.
Doug Morse

5) Best excuse I came up with for being out past curfew.
It was 2 in the morning and I was throwing up on the front hall carpet: It was all Malcolm's fault - he made me drink the Southern Comfort. My mother really didn't like Malcom so she half believed it.

6) Saturday cartoon character I had a crush on.
We didn't have television until I was 14 - I think I may have mentioned my father thought it would be the demise of the family unit so I didn't watch Saturday morning cartoons. Sadly we only got a television after he died and at that point Saturday morning was a work day.

7)Cartoon character I wanted to be.
Peter Pan - in fact there is a picture somewhere of me in a Peter Pan costume my mother made for me. To further my humiliation I should dig it out and post it. And the first person that makes a crack about Tinker Bell is going to get such a dousing with fairy dust!

8)Foods I can no longer stomach.
Southern Comfort - see answer 5. Wait that doesn't really count as food does it. Beets and fava beans.

9)Tacky pick up line you used that worked.
Its been 29 years and I'm old - what's a pick up line? Well okay to a guy at a bar in Toronto about 30 million years ago: Ya wanna? He did and we did.

10)Secret Hangover recipe.
If one drinks in moderation there is no need for a hangover recipe is there?

There - save for the Peter Pan picture I have debased myself for all and sundry to read and hold up to ridicule. Plus the damn spell check has suddenly switched to Italian and I don't know why so I've made more spelling mistakes than I normally do.

And I now pass the torch to one of my oldest Blog Buddies (in terms of reading only) the Evil one in Boston and to a new Blog Buddy SageWeb on the Pacific Coast. Got to it guys.

And Dora my darling - thanks this was that much needed diversion. And Tater I will be asking RG and EG to meat out suitable punishment when they see you in New York - and I want the pictures!

07 gannaio - San Raimondo

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Stopped me in my tracks before my Tink comment could even be properly formulated. RATS!
However:
"4) The funniest thing I did in a house of worship.
Doug Morse
"

LAUGHITY LAUGH LAUGH SNORT
Oh but do lurve me some Canadians.

Doralong said...

Hey- you came out looking like the charming, cultured gentleman you are and I ended up looking like- oh never mind- Tate's lucky I love him so..

Glad Laurent is home safe and sound dear!

Doralong said...

P.S.- Dreary my scrawny ass..

Sling said...

Oh..Post that pic of you in the Peter Pan get-up...I'll make popcorn.

Elizabeth said...

"Inadequately Canadian?' I'm with Doralong. You come out looking like a prince among men. (I think you should leave Corey to your less civilized cyber posse. We'll "educate" him!!!)

sageweb said...

Great stuff....wait, What?? I am just a baby blogger. I barely have my blogging wings.
I will be happy to play though. By the way there is no way I could ever sound as cool and sophisticated as you. I am a train wreck.

more cowbell said...

Oh, I hardly think mention of Tinkerbelle is necessary. The Peter Pan ensemble should be quite sufficient.

"Don we now our gay apparel...fa la la la laaaa, la la la la!"

Boy About Town said...

Hey there! I just wanted to let you that google blocked me outta my blog for all of Sunday! I got an email from Google saying that my blog might be a spam blog?! The email said it was most likely a mistake and they were working it out? I have no idea what that means!!! After a full 24 hours without access to my "blogging buddies", I of course include you in this group cause I love ya,they just opened my blog up without another word! Wierd huh? Have you ever heard of such a thing?

Anonymous said...

I am flattered to be included in the exes but a dull detail I hope not.
Miss you both and hope to see you soon. Uncle Purvy is still sad.

Willym said...

Auld/Dora: Blushes and kicks turf with toe, in a ridiuculously boyish manner for a man his age.

Sling: So you're into total humiliation right?

Sageweb: Time for Baby Bloogers to lose their meme virginity. And train wrecks make for interesting reading.

Cowbell: Who's this Don guy?

Boy: All things are possible with Google. As I mentioned on my laptop I was getting Italian spell check and Comment dialogue boxes. On my desktop I get Dashboard in Polish. Still haven't figured that out.

Blakie: Hope Florida was good. We miss you too and Reese loved his Uncle Pervy.

Anonymous said...

Just love your rambalings
vince

Anonymous said...

My goodness Mr Popular! I thought I was going to have to scroll down for ten minutes in order to leave my comment! What a pleasure to read your 10 questions, Willym. I was snorting as well about the house of worshiping Doug (or was it the other way around?). Anyone that could say you lack an education, especially after getting to know you over the past year, deserves a resounding punch in the nose. I hereby volunteer my services. Loved your post sweetheart.

Am I off the hook for the meme yet? All these people so enjoyed yur answers...

Lorraine said...

I think Canadians are very interesting. You in particular.

BigAssBelle said...

Ya wanna? He did and we did.

very smooth, sophisticated and effective. i bow to your succinct and successful invitation ;-)

i love these!!! when others do them!!!! because now i feel as if i know you better!! the great thing about being a non-blogger now is that folks can't threaten me with these wicked memes.

good stuff.