Showing posts with label Dreary Facts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dreary Facts. Show all posts

Monday, January 07, 2008

10 Dull Details about a Dreary Canuck

So my dear Doralong has decided I'm to be the next victim of this evil plot to destroy character and heap humiliation on honourable heads - hey I alliterated! I feel so inadequately Canadian when I see other friends response to these questions. Here goes.

1) Three Exes I would pretend not to know today:
I am one of those people who's always spoken with my Exes - so damned civilized us Canucks eh? - because there was a time when they meant something in my life. Though I would probably be cool with Corey - after all he had me totally convinced that I was an uneducated dolt because I didn't have a University degree and he was ashamed of our relationship because of it. Alan I would embrace warmly because the red colour his face would turn would compliment his black cassock and purple cincture. Sadly George and Lawrence were early victims of AIDS and I only wish I could see them again. Blake - well damn it he took the pictures at my wedding this past year. And Doug - he introduced me to Laurent so when I do see him I have to thank him for the past 29 years. Okay this is getting a bit too much. Next?

2) The most scandalous rumor to pass through my high school.
Which one? Which one? Bill Bennet doing it with Meredith Wright in her living room when her parents came home - nope that was Junior High. Ricky Braithwaite doing it with Rosalind Pritchard in a box car down by the railway tracks (hey I'm not making this up you know) - nope Junior High again. Me doing it with Bob Reynolds or Billy Gale or Harry Price in the school washroom - nope we kept that fairly hush hush. It would have to be Mr. Crozier feeling up Valerie Carter in the lab storage room and her reporting it to her parents. Mr. Crozier went on a realllly long sabatical after that.

3) The time I Knew Santa didn’t exist.
When I was home from school sick and I overheard my mother on the phone ordering my Walt Disney Theatre set from Eaton's. I would have been about 8 or 9 but I didn't break the news to my mother until I was 20.

4) The funniest thing I did in a house of worship.
Doug Morse

5) Best excuse I came up with for being out past curfew.
It was 2 in the morning and I was throwing up on the front hall carpet: It was all Malcolm's fault - he made me drink the Southern Comfort. My mother really didn't like Malcom so she half believed it.

6) Saturday cartoon character I had a crush on.
We didn't have television until I was 14 - I think I may have mentioned my father thought it would be the demise of the family unit so I didn't watch Saturday morning cartoons. Sadly we only got a television after he died and at that point Saturday morning was a work day.

7)Cartoon character I wanted to be.
Peter Pan - in fact there is a picture somewhere of me in a Peter Pan costume my mother made for me. To further my humiliation I should dig it out and post it. And the first person that makes a crack about Tinker Bell is going to get such a dousing with fairy dust!

8)Foods I can no longer stomach.
Southern Comfort - see answer 5. Wait that doesn't really count as food does it. Beets and fava beans.

9)Tacky pick up line you used that worked.
Its been 29 years and I'm old - what's a pick up line? Well okay to a guy at a bar in Toronto about 30 million years ago: Ya wanna? He did and we did.

10)Secret Hangover recipe.
If one drinks in moderation there is no need for a hangover recipe is there?

There - save for the Peter Pan picture I have debased myself for all and sundry to read and hold up to ridicule. Plus the damn spell check has suddenly switched to Italian and I don't know why so I've made more spelling mistakes than I normally do.

And I now pass the torch to one of my oldest Blog Buddies (in terms of reading only) the Evil one in Boston and to a new Blog Buddy SageWeb on the Pacific Coast. Got to it guys.

And Dora my darling - thanks this was that much needed diversion. And Tater I will be asking RG and EG to meat out suitable punishment when they see you in New York - and I want the pictures!

07 gannaio - San Raimondo