People have said how terrible it must have been when my mother died and he could not come back from Jordan in time. Or when the decision had to be made to stop our Bundnie's heart. And to most people I guess those would be the obvious times that being apart would be difficult. Strangely those where not the times I missed him most. During those bad moments there were always friends and family to help carry the burden of grief, disappointment or even anger.
No it wasn't the bad times but the good where the feeling of loneliness was keenest. The not being able to share something wonderful that had happened. It could be something as momentous as the first time a training course I wrote was sold to another company - no profit for me but a bit of glory. There was no one to come home to and say: Hey honey break open the cheap bubbly! You'll never guess what happened at work today! It was at birthdays or holidays like Thanksgiving - Christmas is one holiday that we have never spent apart - that gathering with friends, though wonderful, wasn't quite enough. Or even simply yelling "Hey come here, you have to see this!" when you've found a piece of nonsense on YouTube that you wanted to share. Those are the occasions when being apart can be the hardest.
Fortunately we are no longer in that situation - and hopefully won't be again, though we said that once before and look what happened. But being out on posting means that we are missing celebrations and joyous events with friends and members of our extended family back in Canada.
In the past two months we have missed our friend Jean-Paul's 60th birthday party and our adopted-nephew Andrew's wedding to his beautiful Jessica. Both of which we wanted to be a part of with all our hearts. But distance and timing just make it impossible.
Sadly this weekend we are missing another joyous event and cause for celebration. Our friends Robert and Martin (that's them working in the kitchen during our holiday in Niagara-on-the-Lake back in 2002) are getting married on Saturday. As always they know how to throw a party! It will be a three day event at their place in Mont Tremblant. We'll be missing the pool party, a great reception and Sunday brunch but most of all we'll miss two of our good friends making a life-commitment to a relationship that began 10 years ago.
I know they will be too busy this weekend to see this posting but just in case they do. Robert and Martin, we love you very much and wish we could be with you and join in the celebrations.
And here's another picture from that week back in the summer of '02. Laurent (l), John, Martin and Robert get set to dig in on their night to cook.
Auguri e baci carini!
20 giugno - San Silverio